The 12 Beers of Christmas: Day 4
On the 4th day of Christmas, Julia recommended to me…
You Won’t from Lamplighter Brewing Company
(Cambridge, MA)
and
Unaccompanied Minors (2006)!
Today, I bring you yet another dynamic duo of two of my favorite things: local IPAs, and underrated comedy films! As I’m putting together this rendition of Beermas, I’m thrilled to announce that You Won’t is back in rotation at Lamplighter (aka my second home when we’re not in a global pandemic), and Unaccompanied Minors is available on HBO Max—it’s a Christmas miracle!
You Won’t is an example of Lamplighter doing what they do best: a hoppy, hazy, fruity IPA. This 7.3% ABV American-style IPA is brewed with small-batch malts from Maine alongside Mosaic and Simcoe hops. This is the kind of beer that when you’re drinking it, you’re like, “If I had to explain what beer was to aliens, I’d start them out on this one.” Or…is that just me?
Regardless, the angsty “I dare you” energy of the beer’s name completely resonates with the many shenanigans that unfold throughout Unaccompanied Minors.
Unaccompanied Minors is a hoot, a holler, and a half with Christmas spirit to boot! Based on the true story of a band of rascal tweens trapped in a blizzard while flying on Christmas Eve, this movie is chock full of hijinks, wholesome characters, and just straight-up solid comedy writing. And that’s not even mentioning the star-studded cast: Lewis Black, Wilmer Valderrama, Mindy Kaling, Rob Riggle, BJ Novak, Kristen Wiig, Rob Corddry, and Mario Lopez?! If you’re waiting for a sign that you need to watch Unaccompanied Minors tonight, this is it.
After yesterday’s email, we’re all pretty familiar with what fun Goses the world has to offer. Blame It On My Juice is Lamplighter’s fruited Gose series, which is much more approachable than the whacky pickle options we’ve looked at so far. The cranberry rendition of this series is my undisputed favorite and go-to order whenever I see it available. Plus, at 4.4% ABV, I can crush a couple of these bad boys while watching the Bachelor and not worry about getting lost in the (cranberry) sauce. The juicy fruitiness balances out a subtle sour pucker to make a deliciously tart bev that you should seriously keep in mind for Thanksgiving 2021. While these cans may be levying blame at the juice, the UMs are absolutely going to be blaming their overwhelmed (and underpaid) handler, Zach Van Bourke.
The Upsidedown is an 8% ABV dark Saison that is roasty and toasty and perfect for warming up after a long uphill trek through the snow-covered wilderness with your trusty Aquaman action figure to find a Christmas tree with which you and your UM comrades will spread holiday cheer to your fellow stranded passengers back at the airport. (I do not care if these references are too niche, go watch the damn movie!) This beer has toffee notes that border on burnt marshmallow as well as a holiday spice profile of clove and anise on the nose—truly a tasty treat!
Donna really said, “ACAB—even the TSA” with this move! If you can’t find Lamplighter in your area, definitely sip on something that harkens back to what you’d grab if you were left to your own devices as a UM. Look for anything that radiates “My First Beer” energy—I’m thinking along the lines of Keystone or Corona.
Happy holidays ya filthy animals!
Looks like Sofia is auditioning to be the spokesmodel for The Upsidedown with this nap pose! Coincidentally, she’s snuggled up on top of a vintage winter coat that I bought a couple of summers ago at The Garment District, which is located down the block from Lamplighter. And, yes, I bought a winter puffy coat in the middle of the summer (after a particularly fun afternoon at the brewery). I wear this jacket nearly every day and a Local Gay™ recently called it iconic, so no regrets!